For performance by a mixed chorus of glaciers and ice sheets, and sung to the tune of "Onward Christian Soldiers."
Onward grind the glaciers, Surging o'er the land.
Ice sheets dream of ice falls Where the cities stand.
Though we're now divided, We'll together flow
Bringing snow and permafrost and Raising albedo.
Onward yet the glaciers
Surge with pond'rous tread,
With the fimbulwinter
Going on ahead.
1985
Oranges freeze in Florida, Phoenix reels in snow.
All the world is wond'ring Where we next will go.
Shall we sink a tanker? (Columbia Glacier, solo)
Surge, and raise the sea? (West Antarctic Ice Sheet, solo)
Wrap the world from pole to pole in Icy purity?
Onward yet the glaciers
Surge with pond'rous tread
With the fimbulwinter
Going on ahead.
1986
See the mighty Hubbard Thrust into the sea,
Trapping seals and dolphins, what Fools these mortals be!
Though the rise of Russell Lake Swept away their pen,
Wait til next year and the Hubbard Will be back again!
Onward yet the glaciers
Surge with pond'rous tread,
With the fimbulwinter
Going on ahead!
1987
Arctic haze and CO2: Men dispute our sway.
We have plans against them, See how, far away,
High above Antarctica Crystals fill the air,
Helping chlorine take away the Ozone layer there,
Onward yet the glaciers
Surge with pond'rous tread,
With the fimbulwinter
Going on ahead.
1989
Did we catch you by surprise As the year rolled in?
Freezing pipes and ice fog, Ice will always win.
Minus forty felt just great On November ten,
We'll be back to see you but we'll Leave you guessing when.
Onward yet the glaciers
Surge with pond'rous tread,
With the fimbulwinter
Going on ahead.
1990
Can the clouds replace us In our feedback role?
Silly bits of vapor Climate can't control!
They don't even know their sign! Now, that's just not nice.
We are large and positive Let's hear a cheer for ice!
Onward yet the glaciers
Surge with pond'rous tread,
With the fimbulwinter
Going on ahead.
1991
Glaciers love a cloudy day, with Sulfate drifting high.
Pinatubo thrilled us, Blasting at the sky.
Aerosols are scatt'ring light, Greenhouse, go away!
We'll spread out, increase albedo, Dig in here to stay.
Onward yet the glaciers
Surge with pond'rous tread,
With the fimbulwinter
Going on ahead.
1992
Once men thought that winter cold Helped to make us grow.
We'll take any winter, Give us summer snow!
Snow in lowlands into May, White Septembers, too,
Help us glaciers grow until we Surge all over you!
Onward yet the glaciers
Surge with pond'rous tread,
With the fimbulwinter
Going on ahead.
1994
See the Bering Glacier Surging on its way,
Scribing loops and swirlings, Geo-art, we'd say.
Glaciers all are artists, Modeling the land.
Mountains would be boring things, Without our helping hand.
Onward yet the glaciers
Surge with pond'rous tread,
With the fimbulwinter
Going on ahead.
1995
Did you think you understood Glaciers' surging play?
Variegated caught you By surprise, I'd say.
Surges' periodicity Varies as we please.
Dam the rivers! Cut the pipeline! Topple stately trees!
Onward still the glaciers,
Surge with pond'rous tread,
With the Fimbulwinter
Going on ahead.
1996
Blizzards rage across the Plains, Floods strike the Northwest.
When it comes to weather, Glaciers do it best.
Now the ENSO's gone away We can do our thing.
Chill Alaska AND the East Coast: See what NEXT year brings!
Onward yet the glaciers
Surge with pond'rous tread,
With the fimbulwinter
Going on ahead.
1997
Once again, El Nino Blocks our destiny.
Land that once was our land, Ours again will be.
You can slow us eith the breath Of your fossil fuels,
If you think you've trly stopped us,
You are then the fools.
Onward yet the glaciers
Surge with pond'rous tread,
With the fimbulwinter
Going on ahead.
1998
We are paranoid, you think, Shrinking back in fear?
Look at what the weather's Handed us this year!
Hardly any snow this spring, Little more in fall,
Rain to melt us in the summer. Strike back, glaciers all!
Onward yet the glaciers
Surge with pond'rous tread,
With the fimbulwinter
Going on ahead.
1999
See the Himalayas rise Far into the sky,
We will help erode them, Where the winds blow by,
Sucking carbon from the air, Sending it to sea,
Kill the greenouse, bring the icehouse, Let the glaciers be!
Onward yet the glaciers
Surge with pondr'us tread
With the Fimbulwinter
Going on ahead!
2000
Once this world was covered up Pole to pole with snow
Naught you'd see but whiteness, Anywhere you'd go
Glaciers fattened on the land, Sea ice ruled the sea,
What an error when the Cambrian Let complex life be!
Onward yet the glaciers
Surge with pondr'us tread
With the Fimbulwinter
Going on ahead!